21 5 / 2012
in my head, when I think about the future kids I will have, I always think about having girls. I’m an only child, and I have limited experience with boys. girls are familiar to me. also, I think I could raise a kick ass daughter.
but I would like to have a son. their names aren’t as fun to think about as the girl names, but I would like to have one all the same. he would be kick ass. I would teach him “don’t rape”
(Source: whoneedsfeminism)
Permalink 552 notes
21 5 / 2012
okay, so I caved.
I am going back to weight watchers after June 22nd.
Martha (grandmother) is paying for it.
gotta fear that fat.
I’m waiting till then because I am working at a summer program from May 30th to June 22nd.
Also going on vacation tomorrow with my mother and my grandmother.
I am not motivated enough to lose weight on my on.
I am not committed enough to eat healthy without incentive.
Once I did
after doing Weight Watchers for six months
I also lost 30 pounds.
So I’m going back.
and one day I will have it all together.
just not right now.
13 5 / 2012
"So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire and the swing of your hips
Just pull me down hard
And drown me in love"
Permalink 136 notes
13 5 / 2012
let’s put this piece of dialogue here
can we just pretend that you love me?
that everything is okay? because I need to pretend. there isn’t anything left in the real world that I can stand anymore.
jamie blinked at her. she was standing over him, her bump peaking out from under her shirt, fists balled up at her sides. she was trying to pace, but his long legs were in her way from crossing the entirety of the small room.
-you want to play pretend?-
you do it with cate. y’all live in make believe world. why can’t I live there too?
-(he scoffed)I don’t think we live in pretend-
yeah, you’re just your typical straight couple who listens to indie music and has fantastic sex.
-wait, are we going to pretend we have sex?-
jamie, we can have whatever the fuck we want
-are we going to have sex??-
she laughed, cutting through the tension that had suddenly built up in the room, pressing down on their shoulders. he sat up straighter and she stopped pacing. her hand rested on her stomach, stroking it almost thoughtfully.
(she shrugged) everyone thinks we are any way. everyone thinks we have.
-beth, this isn’t the sort of thing you joke about-
pregnancy isn’t either, but her I am laughing it up (she gestures to her stomach and laughs bitterly). you won’t want to fuck a whale.
-you are so far from whale like. more like a sexy dolphin-
there is a pause between them, tight and breathless, before they succumb to laughter. she slides down the wall, landing on the carpet a little hard.
ugh, you’re going to have to help this sexy dolphin get back up. god, you’re such a ‘tard.
-made you laugh though (he winked) you sexy little dolphin, you-
09 5 / 2012
true story, I love how I look naked. It’s the bumps and lumps clothes make that I’m iffy about.
(Source: marfmellow, via lacigreen)
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09 5 / 2012
one reason I am scared to have kids is I do not want to fuck up my daughter (or son) ‘s self image. I feel like I have to make peace with my weight before I have kids. you know, that and having a partner/home/career/appropriate finances.
(Source: thevagavenger, via lacigreen)
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05 5 / 2012
The Skinny Stoner: Marine Workout
**Just to let you know, this shit is difficult. Do it with however much weight you can, reguarding the squats, lunges, and medicine ball work. During my VERY last 2 bicycle crunches, I had what’s called muscle failure, I couldn’t even hold my body up with my ab muscles. THAT IS THE POINT YOU WANT…
I like the descriptions
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01 5 / 2012
"
an ode to stretch marks (and other alien life forms)
"
like rivers running down the
banks of my breasts
the intimate corners of my thighs
like the zebra’s stripes I so
ardently admired in my youth
each one signifying one more
moment one more breath one more
evidence of puberty’s biting wit
in making me a Woman before I ever
saw one in myself
(before others saw within
me the Woman I would
grow to be)
which leads me to my current incarnation
these rivers carved within my tissue
run deep and ragged and long,
some faint streams others oceans in themselves
each one ushering in a new me
as I learned what a Woman was
Supposed to be—
quiet demure a thing of beauty
an Object to cherish while it retains its luster
oiled and
plucked and
inherently somehow bettered
no longer a body but a showcase
a trophy for its owner and her owner—and a
woman is nothing but an
advertisement for some skin care line
minivan shopping mall plastic surgeon
white bread peanut butter
all-american
lifestyle
what they sell you in a woman is a lifestyle
values traits and physicality hand
picked for your enjoyment
never challenging you
sharpening you
only agreeing with you
until you lose your essence too
that’s what they sell you in a woman—
which leads me to my current incarnation
these rivers carved within my tissue
carve within my heart a new
yearning a new
lust for learning
a new
way of life to combat that
which seeks to make
my sex into profit
my sex into a commodity
bought and sold for pennies
those who seek to tell me
my stretch marks
aren’t a think of beauty
they are in fact a problem
here, you poor young thing
here, let me fix that for you
and fifteen serums
seven diets
four permanents
two layers of nail lacquer
and one eternity later
I am no longer a Woman
only a Doll
some window display for the
faint of heart whose conditioning means they
cannot understand or
maybe just cannot handle
what it means to love
a Woman and I
I am all
Woman
in this body I breathe deeply
I feel deeply
I am, deeply
passionately, unequivocally, unrestrainedly, unabashedly
Woman
I am
without apology or philosophy or
theology or prophecy defining me,
without chronology or history or
any other -ology interrupting the flow of
me, a girl of nearly eighteen
darked eyed and beautiful in all my
stretched and marked
glory, in all my purple-red
magnificence
purple is the color of royalty, you know
and I am the Queen of
my soul and my body—
heart and flesh and sinew—
ever follicle freckle scar
every cell
and its infinite capacity for
warmth richness vibrancy
all twisted into a cacophonous symphony
of all that comprises the
Woman
in me
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